Well here I am again. A whisper of my former self. My absence was due to a rather horrid eating disorder and drug abuse. I didnt even relize that I had withered so, until I went shopping today. Before I was a large girl who wore a plus size. Now I wear a 6. Now that I look back on my poetry, I can see myself fading away. Like my sickness played out on paper.

Can you?

You draw near and overtake me,

With a strength thats solid and fascinating.

As your sent engulfs my body,

reminding me of India and lonely melencoly.

Dark spices and dirty deeds,

Dim-lighted room and witches brooms.

Everything and nothing,

different, yet very much the same.

two become one, then three,

but my lover is with her,

not me.

Alas, tis a dream

of what could have been mine,

but proved foly over time.

Depart o wretched pleasure!

find some other heart to haunt.

Go with your visions of him who I want.

His heart wants not me,

so our love cannot be.

Depart o wretched pleasure,

and let me be.

I just found out 3 seconds ago that my step-father asked my mother for a divorce this morning. After 8 years of loving him, she is being forced from his bed and heart. It sickens me. And the worst part is that I really thought that he was different.